If I can do it, You can t00!

As I wake up to this girl next to me, I think to myself . . …How did it all go SO right.

 

 

Being Alone, was one of my biggest fears in life.  I suppose it’s because I grew up with a family who I am still close to till this day.

 From left to right.  Me, my sister, my best friend and cousin–Ralph

My parents came to the U.S. after escaping from communism complimented with a side of pirates(literally) after the Vietnam war–in turn, establishing me and my siblings as first generation Vietnamese. 

Because I’m first generation, the integrity to uphold my culture is very important to my family. And for Asians, RESPECT towards one another is crucial for survival.

 

 

When I think to myself how proper I was while growing up– I cringe in embarrassment. For God’s Sake, the word ”please” was stapled behind all my questions and even statements.

For example, ” Can you let me carry your books for you, Please?”  Or, ” I like the weather today, Please? (Yea I know–it makes no sense…but my english was still evolving back then–so cut me some slack!)”

 

 While growing up, there was an important rule in my parent’s household–which they deemed law: 

“Treat others with respect

and they will do the same with you.”

 Because my parents made such a big deal about this rule–I felt as if they taught me the secret formula towards succeeding in life.

As important as this rule seemed to me, they forgot to tell me it had an important side-note.

When I say side-note, what I mean is:  It’s fine to show someone respect, but to a certain degree.    Because I wasn’t informed, I went Gung-Ho on ” respecting others.”

I would always let people cut in front of me in line, open doors for strangers, if I was asked for favors–I’d do it for anyone–even homeless people! 

 

I was literally, the trademark for pushover. 

 

 This was me (ok not really, but it’s pretty damn close!)  How were you like while growing up?

 

 

 

Of course in my mind, I wasn’t a push-over at all! People loved my company (because I did anything and everything for them)

 

In fact, in the early years my Motto was:

 ” I will be liked by all.”

 

I was very disciplined at my motto: Avoiding confrontations, problems, and even the very thought of someone not smiling at me–made me want to vomit.

I felt if a single person wasn’t happy with me, it would equate to my life becoming a complete failure doomed to forever live in misery.

As much as I prided myself of  “Having No Enemies and being liked by all,” deep down inside I couldn’t fool myself–I was miserable. As a result, food and video games became my savior. 

This lasted for several years–constantly people taking advantage of me, poor lifestyle choices, and to top it off–I didn’t have the slightest opinion to make my own decisions! Whether it’s what or where I’d like to go and do for fun, or asking my friends on their opinion on what I should eat that very day.

Can you imagine that? Someone else dictating every choice and decision you make? From the food you eat to how you should spend your free time (the time you earned for yourself and only yourself). That’s how I essentially felt my life was.

It was during this time, I learned:

“If you don’t have an opinion to make a decision, someone will do it for you.”

During my teennage years, I eventually came to the conscious conclusion of not being happy with myself and the life I created.

So I started taking charge by working out, eating right, and for the first time in my life, I said NO.

I tried hanging out with the cool kids, and started making jokes to create an identity as the “class clown”–but in midst of my attempts, people took it the wrong way. My jokes came off as cocky and people perceived me as an arrogant smart-ass. Also, hanging around the “cooler” kids who were much more in-tuned with their own identities (which were much different from mine), made me look like a “wannabe” trying to fit in.

I just felt like No one Understood me.

 

 

 

 

As you can see, from when I was first born, because of my

ethnic background–I was destined to live a life like most Asian Men, men who:

• Wanted to get laid but couldn’t.
• Had a hard time speaking to not only strangers, but also my own peers.
• No backbone, self identity, or sense of self-decision making what-so-ever.
• Poor Life-style choices which led to over-weight and playing video games as a result, closing myself off to the world.
• Frustrated of being bullied and taken advantaged of all throughout life.
• Didn’t want to change because I was scared of the unknown. 
• and Finally, my ultimately and biggest fear– Being ALONE.

 

 Obviously, I had much to work on. But eventually, just two years ago--my life changed.  

What happened in just TWO years:

• Girlfriends, and many, many dates later (Connecting with women is ultimately, my goal; but I would be lying to you if I said the sex wasn’t great too ) 
• Upon walking into any venue or room, by the end of the night not only will people make the effort on getting to know me, but they will also number-close me for an invite to hang  back out with them.
• Having no backbone is something of the past, I say this confidently because within the first few minutes people recognise me as a leader. 
• Takin’ advantaged of is a trait in which a leader doesn’t have. 
• In my life, change is welcomed (Yea I know, this one’s a No Brainer right? But easier said than done)–it just takes time and the right inner-mental strength of self discovery.
•  With the best family support, the best team of friends, and a never-ending supply of women around the corner- “Being Alone” is something that is practically irrecognizable in my life.

 

How did I accomplish all this in JUST TWO YEARS? 

 

 

 

To be continued . …

 

I will have very special video and maybe an article for you!–So you can start implimenting right away and get the kind of life you deserve very, very soon!

 

 

In the mean time, Enjoy a video of me and my friends just a couple of months BEFORE I took the first few steps on changing my life. FOREVER.

( Below is a video of me and my old friends camping out for 3 days inside a Walmart for the launch of the long awaited, Playstation 3 back in 06′) Enjoy! 

 

 

Timmyswagger’s Ps3 Campout at Walmart!
by timmyswagger